Here, you will find interviews of incarcerated individuals. These conversations offer enlightening perspectives on challenges that the incarcerated deal with inside prison. Our interviews are conducted by our West Block reporter, Edwin.
Edwin Chavez, Spanish Director
I was oblivious to self-love, compassion, empathy, and what it meant to treat others as human beings. This behavior set me on a path for self-destruction driven by low self-esteem, self-pity, and hatred. This made it easy for me to join a gang and be violent- the ingredients for disaster. I feel privileged and humbled to be a part of Humans of San Quentin.
After nearly three decades of incarceration I never imagined that there was this special someone out there in the community who believes in us, the incarcerated, who treats us with dignity and respect, and not as “animals in a cage.” This is Mrs. Diane Kahn.
She has become this superhuman-woman with this invisible cape to us. She continues to generously devote her time and resources in an attempt to humanize the less privileged. I joined HSQ because I am devoted to give a voice to the voiceless, to help change the narrative when it comes to the incarcerated regardless of what led them into prison; our past behaviors do not define the person that stands in front of the mirror 10, 15, 20, or 30 years later.
Change is possible through the proper channels of rehabilitation. I stand in solidarity with HoSQ. I want to bring awareness to my Latino community in and out of these prison walls. HoSQ is there for us all in creating a space for healing and reconciliation with our communities. This is important for me because I shot an innocent person and put a family member in harm’s way because of my gang mentality. I caused terrible harm to too many people. I know that I can never undo the past, but I believe I can make a positive difference for the future, for myself and my community.
Many men and women who are incarcerated will someday be released back into our communities. We need to prepare them as they are about to become our next door neighbors. Please support HoSQ in the fight to educate our communities that we are all humans.
Do you prepare for your interviews?
No. We pick our questions right there, spur of the moment. We refer to it as, “Keep it real and simple.” We naturally had this cool rhythm and vibe. Without thinking about it we were just on the same page. We wanted the real deal, the human side. From childhood traumas, to the impact of gun violence, and mainly we aim at highlighting the transformation of every single person.
What have you learned through these interviews Edwin?
It has brought enlightenment to see into a world full of compassion, understanding and mainly empathy. When I have thought I have it bad, I saw someone else who has it worse, and they too want to be heard. It has taught me that if we work together inside these prison walls in a humane way, the sky shall not be the limit. Collectively we can accomplish just about anything in a prosocial way. It doesn’t matter your race or background or our prior social status. We are all humans who have fallen short of making the right choices. Each interviewee taught me something good about life, even the youngest ones. The reason why we took the approach to interview instead of having them write their stories and submit it by mail, was due to the lockdown. People get stressed out, angry and confused about this situation. We wanted to break through all of the negativity by creating a space for us all to socialize and to be heard during these hard times. People in prison can put a mask on and want to be seen as hard core, bad ass or at least not weak. We wanted to break that stigma. To show ourselves differently to the outside world.
Did you face any barriers?
Time. We were only out of our cells for 90 minutes a day. We had to interview, call families, workout and shower. Then, we had to ask people to give up their time for us. We also interviewed people through the bars of their cells. We tried to write and type standing up, but eventually we would sit on the bars outside their cell.
Why did you start interviewing people Edwin?
During the Omicron outbreak, I found myself inside West Block feeling tension in the air. It showed in people’s behavior. We were concerned with the uncertainty of the new variant. I found myself tense, confused and angry at the fact that my overnight family visit with loved ones was canceled three separate times. I asked myself, “How do other prisoners feel? What can I do to make a difference, how can I give a voice to the voiceless?” I was also reflecting on the fact that one of my inside team members, Miguel, had just been denied parole. I could see it in his eyes that he was stressed and going through it. I saw how he was hurt. I’ve been denied parole four times, and I know the feeling of being shut down. This is when I decided to invite Miguel to do interviews. Luckily, he agreed. We had volunteer jobs that let us out of our cells, I was a janitor and Miguel was a messenger. Miguel and I immediately became a good team.
Is there anything else you want to share?
To us your voice matters. We personally think that when you engage in a conversation with someone they are more open to just say it how it is. We try to bring that genuine side out. Typically people who write in are more concerned about the grammar, spelling, or saying the “right” thing, as they are trying to pour out their thoughts. These can be discouraging. We are grateful to have the opportunity to be of service in what is a challenging environment, to be of service to those who may not yet have their humanity shown to the world.
Who were you then and who are you now?
I am a survivor and my hope and my prayer is that in telling my story, someone will hear it and know that they are not alone. This is something that we deal with as child survivors. We feel that we are alone and have no one to turn to – especially behind these walls.
Richard (Rock), 53
Meet Rock......people have different perceptions in their head about people and that’s not the way it’s supposed to be. Richard “Rock” 53 Incarcerated: 30 years At nine, I was short and had a stance, so they called ‘lil Rock.’ When I got bigger, it...
What would you tell the old Andrew?
“You need to relax from being the foolish person that you are.” The person I am today is happy and thankful for the foolish person that I was because through the old me, I was able to learn to be a better person. I am thankful for how this time has changed me. It really opened my eyes and helped me become a better person.
Art is a passion of mine where I can be creative and help someone else feel joy and satisfaction in what I draw and design, for them to feel a positive emotion. I was missing that in my life and they may be missing that in their life.
Conversations from the cell introduction
Two of our team members Miguel and Edwin, who live behind the wall, took the initiative to interview men and snail mail them to us. Here we get to find out why. Why did you start interviewing people? Edwin: During the Omicron outbreak, I found...