In the past 5 years I’ve met murderers who’ve received a lesser sentence.
Horrific child rapists have gone free. Meth and opioid addicts come and go like the wind.
I woke up in the New Rino-Valley Regional Jail. I had no idea what had happened, why I was there, and no one would tell me.
I was severely beaten. Two black eyes, a fist print on my neck, a boot print on my arm, six walnut sized lumps in a line across my head, hand injuries, the left one is now partially crippled. This was local police retribution. I was placed into solitary confinement where I spent most of the next seven months.
In the SHU, I was beaten four times by the same guard, to the point of blood in my urine from kicks to the lower back.
I was the victim of egregious constitutional and human rights violations. I’ve had five years of open torture, gross abuse and inhuman treatment.
My writing has gained me the attention of prison admin who have repeatedly targeted me for retribution, often at the hands of white supremacists who are prisoner here, but friendly with their captors on the streets.
Up here, everyone seems to be some kind of related.
I have steadily improved my writing, but my state of being declines daily. I talk to all of three people, rarely leave the cell for any reason and have begun to give very serious consideration to a more permanent end to this nightmare.
Nine more years of dreadful psychological abuse and violence, with the always lingering threat of physical violence, seems like a poor choice of the two I have. Suffer, or call it quits, be at peace, and leave a lot of questions to be answered.
I’ve documented EVERYTHING in the past five years. Thousands of pages of journal entries, hundreds of essays and letters.
I’ve paid my debt and several others’ debts as well. I’m tired, I’m frustrated, and I’ve endured too much for too long.
For all the people who claim to care and all those who know, unequivocally, that I should be set free, I am still being held illegally, and no one has raised their voice. No one has once stood by me or attempted to defend me. Not a single soul.