Meet Steven…

 I want to raise awareness on mental health,  emotional and cognitive behavioral understanding, and take our power back. Our power to respond and our power of choice.

How could the best thing that ever happened to me, be connected to the worst thing? Before incarceration I was an ‘outlier.’ I was a young black man that ‘made it.’ I was in the Oakland Electricians Union as a journeyman, it was a long career starting at $8.00 an hour. It seems out there, we are judged by our financial standings, for me emotional intelligence was the missing factor. Prison is changing me for the better. Just like in society, I have the choice to choose bad or good. Instead of drowning in work or ‘handling business,’ In here, I have the chance to process in this ‘walled garden.’ I am able to cultivate new skills rather than being impulsive and trapped in male bravado. God willing – when I’m released I hope to be a part of changing and breaking generational curses. I want to raise awareness on mental health,  emotional and cognitive behavioral understanding, and take our power back. Our power to respond and our power of choice. We are all humans, no one is perfect. From this day forward, with the mercy God has shown me,  I’d like to share that with others.

Meet Victor…

Being in here has really opened my eyes to a lot of things and it has really taught me more about myself and who I really am.

I got 14 years and four months for second degree robbery, second degree burglaries with a ten year gun enhancement, this is my first time ever coming to prison. I never thought that I would ever be here. I was raised well by my grandparents who I love very much. I guess you can say I hung around the wrong crowd and let my pride get in the way. Being in here has really opened my eyes to a lot of things and it has really taught me more about myself and who I really am. Captivity has taught me how valuable life is.  I have lost three family members while being locked up and what made it hard was that I couldn’t be there. As I’m getting older, I’ve gained more wisdom and confidence. I wish that what I know now, I knew back then. I think my family would be proud of me,  I’ve come a long way and have been strong minded. I talk to my grandmother a lot. She’s a mother to me and my best friend. When I get out I want to look for a job to help her. What goes through my mind each day? My three beautiful kids and what I will do for them when I come home. I want to be the best dad for them. What am I trying to change about myself? I want to be a better person and think things out before I react. I dropped out of school when I was 15 so I could work. Today I’m trying to get my GED so that I can have a better job. What was the first package I received in prison?  First, I was very surprised because I didn’t know you could get a lot of nice things sent in here. When I got it I was very happy. I was also surprised that I was eligible to work and live at a fire camp, I didn’t know it existed. I thank God for helping me stay positive and strong minded. Without him I would be lost. I’m looking forward to going to church when I am released. I hope my family will see how much I have changed in prison.

Meet Walter…

I always heard that if you find something that you enjoy for work, it’s never work. I found something I like and enjoy and it has never been work.

I’m currently serving a 15-to-life sentence for attempted murder. I want to start this off by saying that because I’m not the same person who committed that crime. I am a changed man! Part of my transformation is because of the most wonderful people I have ever met in here, many of them in the midst of classes I participated in and facilitated. One of those groups or classes is the Peer Health Education Course. It included learning about STDs, STIs, Hepatitis A, B, C, HIV, AIDS and transmissions regarding how these diseases and viruses are communicable. This class shook me to my core because I could personally identify with everything I was learning. It inspired me to want to do more within the prison community, so I turned in an application to be a facilitator. I have to tell you a little bit about that. I’ve never been a group speaker. I can speak amongst my peers, but never in a public setting. I was so inspired by what I was learning, I took a leap of faith, and I have never looked back or had one regret. I always heard that if you find something that you enjoy for work, it’s never work. I found something I like and enjoy and it has never been work. Sad to say, since the pandemic, we have lost our facilitator, so if there is anybody within earshot with an interest, I would like to send out a formal request to help us and see what we can do to get our health education class inside San Quentin running again. If you want to volunteer please contact Diane at Humans of San Quentin. We still help each other in here as much as we can without sponsorship, but we need your help. Thank you for the space to share this story. Enclosed is a photo of me circa 2014.

Meet Walter…

Satan had many strongholds in my life and I was headed nowhere good.

My usually single mom did the best she could for me. I was an only child, shy, had very few friends, was an outcast and I felt awkward and out of place. Kids made fun of me. I can only remember two occasions in which I had a sleep-over at a friend’s house and no one ever came to mine. I was never subjected to the juvenile care system. My daughters would not be so lucky. By middle school, I was in trouble with drugs, alcohol, having sex and found a group that accepted me. Temporarily, I got good grades, played sports, and lived the ‘Bad Boy’ life. It wasn’t long before sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll ruled me. By tenth grade, I was a runaway living on the streets. Satan had many strongholds in my life and I was headed nowhere good. All my life I was plagued by an unquenchable desire to find love. At 23, my life took a dramatic turn. I became a father. I finally felt complete and I feel deeply in love with my daughters. It was too much for either of us and I turned to my addictions. Child Protective Services took the girls from my ex. I had done exactly what my father did. He left for war and never returned home to me. I had failed my daughters. This reality snapped me out of my sick depravity. I got a job and turned to my family for help. Months later I was awarded full custody. Not wanting to repeat the mistakes of my past, I buried myself in work and my girls. We were a loving family, but still broken. The stress and isolation wore me down, I was in trouble with drugs and women again. I abandoned them dozens of times over the next 20 years, always for the lust of the flesh and pride. I was plagued and haunted by my past, running from my childhood and the pain that I had inflicted on my loved ones. Today, I have the love of Christ in my life and am looking at attending seminary school. I’m working on rebuilding my relationships with my daughters. God is rebuilding me from the inside out and I’m learning daily what it means to be a child of God. To heal this bipolar being has taken years of true unwavering love. I no longer need someone to complete me and am able to love my family and friends.